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<h1>How To Text Like An Alpha Male</h1>
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<p class="nav"><span class="nav-left">Listed under <a href="/heartiste-2011.html">Heartiste: 2011</a>.</span><span class="nav-right"><a href="/theme.html">Theme</a></span></p>
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<p>From the <a href="https://heartiste.org/2011/02/28/how-to-text-like-an-alpha-male/" target="_blank">original article</a> on February 28, 2011. Author: <a href="https://heartiste.org/" target="_blank">Chateau Heartiste</a>.</p>
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<!-- This article was generated automatically using GigaChad System Alpha: HEARTISTE v1.0. If there are any stylistic errors or bugs, please report them. -->
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<p>Reader “Marshy” is becoming the Chateau’s “text guy”. He sent in this example:</p>
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<blockquote><p>A recent conversation from my FB below, names changed to protect the innocent-</p><p>Marshy: I would totally fuck you in that wig 😛</p><p>Girlie: I look forward to it.</p><p>Marshy: I get back in a week, tell your boyfriend to keep you warmed up for me till I get back.</p><p>Girlie: I think “he” is out of batteries 🙁</p><p>Marshy: c=====3</p><p>Girlie: 🙂</p><p>Marshy: c===============3</p><p>Girlie: Wow, someone needs to cum. I’m going to suck you off so awesome when you get back</p><p>Marshy: hang in there, lotsa cocka soon</p><p>Witty banter is for beginners. Be the caveman on 4chan. He’s real, he says things that amuse him. He farts in bed and hogs the blanket, he makes her feel virtuous and mature by comparison. She lubs him for it.</p><p>Long live “lotsa cocka”.</p></blockquote>
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<p>I like the haphazard attention to punctuation. It’s the little details that matter.</p>
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<p>Some of you are probably wondering what’s so special about cavemanning a fuckbuddy. She’s already in his sexual orbit. (Men have a lovers orbit, women have a eunuchs orbit.) She’s not going to go anywhere, you may say.</p>
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<p>Not so fast. That kind of thinking leads to complacency, and eventually to getting dumped. Game never rests, because female hypergamy never rests, that is until she has fattened up or aged out of options. I’ve witnessed friends lose fuckbuddies because they became romantically enamored with them, ditching the dirty talk for flowers and soft mewlings of love.</p>
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<p>Fuckbuddies are an unusual breed of women. Most women, despite what braggadocio “gurus” say, are not down with fuckbuddy status. Now it is possible to string along a woman in a <em>de facto</em> FB zone, but this requires some deft prevarication and stalling. That is advanced game for those men already capable of getting laid with one girl at a time. The other option is to be totally candid with women and tell them they will be infrequent sexual flings, and nothing more. Vanishingly few women will agree to such an arrangement, no matter how much alpha indifference you project.</p>
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<p>Generally, high T women — think tomboys, lawyers, Irish maids, strippers, cougars and women with leathery skin, small tits, hairy ass cracks or acne — are more amenable to openly acknowledged FB arrangements. Some of these high T women can be attractive enough to boff, and boy can they fuck like lionesses. The only cuddling you’ll be doing is between her beef drapes.</p>
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<p>Marshy is right about being an animal. Women love untamed men, because they love having something to bitch about. A bitching-free life is a boring, drama-free life to a woman, and no woman, no matter how grounded, can survive long without the fever for a flavor of a tingle.</p>
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<p class="C">Library of GigaChad | <a href="/" target="_blank">GigaChad</a></p>
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