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    <h1>Things A Man Should Never Say First In A Relationship</h1>
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<p class="nav"><span class="nav-left">Listed under <a href="/heartiste-2011.html">Heartiste: 2011</a>.</span><span class="nav-right"><a href="/theme.html">Theme</a></span></p>
<p>From the <a href="https://heartiste.org/2011/05/08/things-a-man-should-never-say-first-in-a-relationship/" target="_blank">original article</a> on May 8, 2011. Author: <a href="https://heartiste.org/" target="_blank">Chateau Heartiste</a>.</p>
  <!-- This article was generated automatically using GigaChad System Alpha: HEARTISTE v1.0. If there are any stylistic errors or bugs, please report them. -->
  <p>We <a href="/science-validates-another-game-concept.html" target="_blank">already know</a>, thanks to the spiritually enriching wisdom of this blog, that a man should never say ‘I love you’ before his girlfriend has said it. But there’s more.</p>
  <p>Reader Shark writes:</p>
  <blockquote><p>Other things to never say first:</p><p>“I miss you”<br/> “Let’s be exclusive”<br/> “I want to have children”</p></blockquote>
  <p>These are all right on the money. In fact, the only way a man can say the above and remain optimally attractive to his girlfriend is if a “too” is appended to each. For example:</p>
  <p>“I miss you, too”</p>
  <p>“I want to be exclusive, too”</p>
  <p>“I want to have children, too. Wait... what?”</p>
  <p>Better yet, a shit-eating smirk in response to a girlfriend saying any of the above works wonders to beef up alpha allure.</p>
  <p>Additional emotional outpourings a man should never say first in a relationship:</p>
  <p>“Let’s move in together”<br/> “I was worried about you”<br/> “At least let me know where you’ll be”<br/> “Can I have your work number so I have a way to reach you in case of emergency?”<br/> “I love cats”<br/> “Your farts smell like a bouquet of roses”</p>
  <p>The problem with emotional outpourings is that they will be perceived differently depending on the sex of the recipient. When a man hears these things from a girlfriend, he thinks ‘Wow, this chick is into me. The sex spigot is open at full blast!’</p>
  <p>But when a woman hears these things unprompted from a boyfriend, she thinks ‘Aw, how sweet, he likes me. Hm. Kinda needy, though, isn’t it? Why are my labia curling inward?’</p>
  <p>To a woman’s ears, her boyfriend’s ‘I miss you’ never just means ‘I miss you’. It also means ‘I’m really scared you’ll leave me’, and ‘I’m saying this as part of a passive-aggressive strategy to guilt you into continuing to allow me access to your pussy’, and ‘My god, there’s no way I can get another woman if you decide to upgrade.’ So be careful about not just the timing, but the tonality, of when and how you tell a lover you miss her, love her and/or wish to commit to her. Good rules of thumb:</p>
  <ol><li>Make sure she has said it first at some point in the relationship.</li><li>Wait at least three months into the relationship before dropping any emotional outpouring bombs (EOBs).</li><li>Never drop an EOB before you’ve had sex with her ten or more times.</li><li>Do not drop an EOB right after, or right before presumed, sex. Same goes for the immediate time after a fight. It will sound obligatory and, hence, false. EOBs are best deployed in an unpredictable manner, when she least expects them.</li></ol>
  <p>EOBs are inherently beta, and thus must be used with caution. Acts of beta (AoB) are never meant to be avoided entirely — the AoB is, in fact, a <a href="/vulnerability-game.html" target="_blank">critical component</a> of relationship game that helps to solidify a girlfriend’s feelings of comfort and security in your company — but they do need to be utilized with the utmost care, because overuse can happen quickly and *will* degrade a girlfriend’s attraction to you.</p>
  <p>Some of you will undoubtedly ask, “Well, what if she never says any EOB first?” If that’s the case, then you shouldn’t consider her anything more than a fuck toy. Additional commitment with such a woman is courting heartbreak. Any woman truly falling for you will wind up blurting out an EOB against her better judgment. A <a href="/love-when-women-turn-into-beta-males.html" target="_blank">woman in love</a> can’t help herself.</p>
  <p><strong>Maxim #26: Women secretly hope that you won’t rob them of the opportunity to make themselves vulnerable before your alpha inscrutability.</strong></p>
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