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<title>Sweeps Week: 2015 Punchable Shitlib Face Tournament: First Round Winners — GigaChad</title>
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<h1>Sweeps Week: 2015 Punchable Shitlib Face Tournament: First Round Winners</h1>
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<p class="nav"><span class="nav-left">Listed under <a href="/heartiste-2015.html">Heartiste: 2015</a>.</span><span class="nav-right"><a href="/theme.html">Theme</a></span></p>
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<p>From the <a href="https://heartiste.org/2015/12/10/sweeps-week-2015-punchable-shitlib-face-tournament-first-round-winners/" target="_blank">original article</a> on December 10, 2015. Author: <a href="https://heartiste.org/" target="_blank">Chateau Heartiste</a>.</p>
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<!-- This article was generated automatically using GigaChad System Alpha: HEARTISTE v1.0. If there are any stylistic errors or bugs, please report them. -->
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<p>The polls for <a href="/sweeps-week-2015-punchable-shitlib-face-tournament.html" target="_blank">most punchable shitlib face of 2015</a> are closed. We have our winners who will advance to the semifinals.</p>
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<p>In what some are calling an upset akin to Buster Douglas-Mike Tyson, <strong>Matty “Polar Bear” Yglesias</strong> edged out [insert double entendre here] Ezra “Null Entity of Nepotism” Klein in Bout 1.</p>
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<p>Bout 2: <strong>Dylan Matthews</strong> doubled Alex Pareene’s vote total. Matthews’ mug inspires twice as many knuckle sandwiches as Pareene’s.</p>
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<p>Bout 3: John Scalzied will be overjoyed that <strong>Pajamaboy</strong> routed him for backpfeifengesicht honors. No doubt Scalzied was dreading his preteen daughter, who can bench press more than him, impulsively clocking him right in the kisser if he had won.</p>
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<p>Bout 4: <strong>Lindsey Graham</strong> didn’t need BACKROOM shenanigans to easily defeat Devin Faraci. (Though it looks like the two of them would’ve loved backroom play together.)</p>
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<p>SEMIFINALS MATCH-UPS</p>
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<p>Matty Yglesias vs Dylan Matthews</p>
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<p>Pajamaboy vs Lindsey Graham</p>
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<p>Geeeeeeeet ready to rumble!</p>
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<p class="C">Library of GigaChad | <a href="/" target="_blank">GigaChad</a></p>
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