50 lines
3.1 KiB
HTML
50 lines
3.1 KiB
HTML
<!DOCTYPE html>
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<html lang="en">
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<head>
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<meta charset="UTF-8">
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<meta name="viewport" content="width=device-width, initial-scale=1">
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<title>Double Bagger — GigaChad</title>
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<link rel="icon" href="/favicon.ico">
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<link rel="stylesheet" href="/style.css?v=1">
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<meta property="og:type" content="website">
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<meta property="og:title" content="Double Bagger — GigaChad">
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<meta property="og:description" content="The greatest website on the interwebz!">
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<meta property="og:image" content="/icons/chads/chad.png">
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</head>
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<body>
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<script>
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const setTheme = () => {
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const root = document.documentElement
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const storage = localStorage.length > 0 ? localStorage : sessionStorage
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for (let key in storage) {
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if (storage.hasOwnProperty(key)) {
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root.style.setProperty(key, storage.getItem(key))
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}
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}
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}
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setTheme()
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document.addEventListener('visibilitychange', () => { if (!document.hidden) setTheme() })
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</script>
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<h1>Double Bagger</h1>
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<div style="text-align: center;">
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<a href="/"><img class="epic" src="/icons/chads/chad.png"></a>
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</div>
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<hr>
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<p class="nav"><span class="nav-left">Listed under <a href="/heartiste-2010.html">Heartiste: 2010</a>.</span><span class="nav-right"><a href="/theme.html">Theme</a></span></p>
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<p>From the <a href="https://heartiste.org/2010/05/30/double-bagger/" target="_blank">original article</a> on May 30, 2010. Author: <a href="https://heartiste.org/" target="_blank">Chateau Heartiste</a>.</p>
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<!-- This article was generated automatically using GigaChad System Alpha: HEARTISTE v1.0. If there are any stylistic errors or bugs, please report them. -->
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<p>Zeets phoned in from the bowels of DC.</p>
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<p>“They passed this law that puts a five cent fee on each bag you use at a store. The city’s already made something like $150K off it.”</p>
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<p>“Leftie fascists.”</p>
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<p>“So I’m standing in line at Giant and don’t have a reusable bag with pictures of basil on it because I’m not a fag. The herb in front of me doesn’t have a reusable bag either. When the cashier asks if he needs a bag he hangs his head down in shame and sheepishly says yes. He couldn’t make eye contact with anyone.”</p>
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<p>“So this is the new SWPL status signal, the reusable bag?”</p>
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<p>“I hate them all. Anyhow, there’s a line of fifteen yuppies behind me. The cashier asks if I need a bag. With my head held high I proudly say ‘Yes, I want a bag. And double bag the milk.’”</p>
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<p>“I like the use of the word ‘want’ instead of ‘need’. Very sly.”</p>
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<p>“Thank you. I made sure to scan the line when I said it. I wanted those herbs to cower in fear.”</p>
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<p>“Did you grunt a little for emphasis?”</p>
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<p>“There was a genital display as well. When you walk down the streets here all the shamed-faced hipsters with plastic bags try to hide them in their coats or behind their backs so people don’t notice. This country needs a good, cleansing total war.”</p>
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<hr>
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<p class="C">Library of GigaChad | <a href="/" target="_blank">GigaChad</a></p>
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</body>
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</html>
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